Just a Little Light

There are some people that simply bring light to my life, and I am truly grateful for them. Sam is one of them. She never hesitates to speak her mind or to tell me exactly how it is. That goes for the good and the bad. I'll tell her about a friendship, or about working with someone, and she will say "Sean. They are treating you like crap. You don't need that." I sometimes hear it a little begrudgingly, because it sometimes sucks to admit friends don't treat you well. She will also tell me if she thinks I'm overreacting or reading too much into something. She knows me well and knows that it's okay to deliver things bluntly. She knows that's the only way I'll hear it. However, I know that Sam only has my heart in mind. She's always looking out for me. The flip side of that is that I always know where I stand with Sam. She is never hesitant to tell me that she loves me. She makes obvious efforts to hang out with me and to be a part of my life. I know that Sam is one of the key people that gets me through life. Truly. 

Jacob is also quite the light for me right now. Hanging out with him is just fun. We play video games, or talk, or shop for office supplies. There's usually food involved, as well as laughter. Lots and lots of laughter. Sometimes we literally just laugh, and then laugh at each other's laugh, and then laugh some more. Jacob makes efforts to spend time with me, and I do the same for him. Lately, Jacob and I have been in situations where we have really gotten to know each other much better. We've gotten to hear about parts of life that we might not normally hear about. We've gotten to deal with some crappy situations as well. It's been solid to have him there to lean on, as well as let him lean some. At one point, he said "Sean, it's kind of tearing my up inside". I responded "YOU FEEL THAT WAY, TOO?!?! Oh thank goodness I'm not the only one!", and that's all I needed. Sometimes just having someone feel the same way as you is all you need. And sometimes knowing that you are cared about gets you through the toughest situations.

I get to talk a lot about faith with both Sam and Jacob. It's an imperative part of our friendships. Between that and the way that we care for each other, I am just incredibly blessed by them. Jacob puts up with hugs, which is great. Sam puts up with my insanity. It all balances out.

I'm literally one of those people that never gets tired of telling people I care. I'm sure some people get tired of hearing it, but I never want someone to misunderstand how I feel about them. I never want someone to have to doubt that I care. Hopefully, whenever I mess up (because I will) they will remember those times that they have heard me say that I care for them or love them or whatever, it will help heal whatever hurt I have caused. Besides, who doesn't, on some lever or another, love hearing that they are loved? I literally never get tired of it. Ever. In fact, sometimes I just really need to hear it. 

Speaking of love, I found out last week that I received an internship with a Young Life camp in Oregon!!! I will be working in the kitchen for three months, overseeing volunteers from high schools and colleges around the country. I'm literally so excited. I cannot wait to love these kids working with me, as well as the campers, and share some Jesus with them. I'm pretty sure I'm going to be a little bit heartbroken at the end of each session as my volunteers leave, but it's the good kind of heartbreak. I'm planning on heading out there around May 16, and I won't be back until mid or late August! SO excited. It's getting me through the semester. 

But before all that, I have 21 credit hours to take on. Plus a piano-organ duets recital. Plus a voice competition. Plus a senior recital. Plus be a Young Life leader. Plus be a good son. Plus be a good friend. Plus find a house for Aaron, Andrew, Jacob, and I to live in. Plus pack up my house. Plus whatever else. I can do this. After all, I am loved.